4-7-12 Patrol (Easter Bunny Goes to Jail)

[Border Patrol]

Citizens!,

I started this day out on a usual patrol but the town seemed void of crime or any other shenanigans. I decided this was a good time as any to go on various quests and hunts because I have heard there was other citizens in need of help. As I was banking my uniform my plans were going to temporarily change.

The morning thief known as Arcturus strolled by me and upon further inspection, had just committed a criminal act. He resisted arrest and I gave chase for a while running him down all over East and West Brit. He finally fell on one of Brit's main bridges into a lifeless stanky corpse and his stolen property was seized as evidence of his crimes.

I changed out of my patrol uniform and equipped a Silver Black Staff of crappyness to go kill some evil Liches that have been causing mayhem in Sosaria. During one of my bank runs I came across Acturus again who was criminal again. I gave chase yet again, and he was quickly taken from the land of the living by my Silver Black Staff of crappyness.

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After destroying the evil Liches I got wind of a citizen who's partner lost some sort of weather map. I changed yet again and this time had a trusty shield which is good for deflecting blows. I have heard the perps were a bunch of smelly orcs so I would need the added protection.

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I made my way to the farms and to my surprise I found a strange rabbit named "the easter bunny." I noticed this strange creature was crapping out some sort of colored eggs. Before I could get my wits about myself an Orcish army approached. I had to defend myself and this "easter bunny" from these foul beings. A battle ensued and after my victory I turned my attention back to this strange rabbit who continued littering and crapping out colored eggs all over the place.

This strange rabbit was hopping all over the place at random and acting very odd and drunk like. Unlike other animals, monsters, and orcs it spoke in a language I could understand. It was quite selective of where it put it's eggs, didn't really notice my presence, and spoke to itself out loud the whole time. This animal was evidently high off of some sort of hallucinogen. I tried speaking to it many times warning the animal that it was breaking Lord British's littering laws but to no avail.
I came to the conclusion that for it's crimes against Lord British and the safety of the citizens this creature must be detained. Since it is some sort of abomination crossed between a bird and a rabbit the Royal Science commitee would need this specimen for study anyways.

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I, Border Patrol, arrested and jailed the easter bunny.

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I stood on guard duty as I sent a courier to summon Lord British's Royal Guards to take this abomination into the castle prison for various tests and experiments. As it was in my custody it kept crapping out eggs and was soo high off of some sort of illegal substance that it never even noticed I was there or that it was locked up. This strange creature seemed to be in it's own little world and could be quite dangerous under non controlled circumstances. I logged it's further egg laying as further evidence of it's crimes.

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After handling the bunny situation I got back into my patrol uniform to make sure all was well within the city.

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While on patrol I spotted Crovax acting rather nervous. I gave him a quick frisk and indeed he had stolen goods on his person. As I attempted to make the arrest he assaulted me and was hell bent on resisting. As the pursuit was going on a nearby citizen joined in for some vigilante Justice. We ran Crovax out of town and the citizens were safe from his sticky fingers once again. Venetici soon showed up to relieve me of my duty and started his own shift to serve Justice to the unjust.

This ends this report.

Border Patrol out

[Blaise]

Well played my good man, well played.

[Lucky]

Love reading your posts. Keep em coming!

Also, having some sort of justice in a game like uo is always grand.