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cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 10:56 pm
by chumbucket
My day started in a normal fashion. I went to West Britain Bank. There I watched MUTORCS pull the old gray at the bank routine. Someone attacked. I tried to help MUTORCS kill him by providing gates to the roof and some blocking when I could. Alas, MUTORCS was a rather crude young man, calling his victims names I will not repeat here. He needed to learn a lesson.

And he did.

I am hidden on the rooftop of the bank, when a gate opens and MUTORCS comes out. I go in and find his home on the other side. Not long afterwards, I am the proud owner of about ten thousand new reagents and a respectable collection of magic weapons.

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To celebrate I gave away some chumboxes. Apparently, not everyone was in the mood for festivities. One irate fellar even accused me of using the dreaded HAX. These special HAX apparently cause you to die when you open a box.

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Now this was all good and well, but nothing to write home about. But soon afterwards something very special happened, perhaps the greatest instance of thievery in the history of UOSA. The loot was substantial, but it was the execution that made it so special.

A gate opens near West Britain Bank. I run over and take a peak. I'm in a tower with three gentlemen. Now these gentlemen never move at the same time. Eventually two of them get in place for a macro session, while on goes in and out quite often. The back room of the first floor contains only secure containers, as does the front room. The stairwell is blocked off by tables. This is not a very promising set up.

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But then I notice that one of the tables is not locked down.

I stealth over and when the moment seems ripe, I lift the table and step forward. I attempt to place the table where I am standing. Like an amateur, I have some trouble getting the table back into its spot. It was a miracle I wasn't noticed.

On the second floor are two containers. One has a quite a few wands. The other has around fifteen thousand reagents. Yes. Fifteen thousand. But just about this time, the owner returns. I can't make my move yet, so I head upstairs to inspect the other floors.

The third floor has a large number of unsecured containers full of weapons, armor and magic jewelery. The top floor has nothing. I head back down and start rummaging through the containers. I collect any pvp weapon plus all of the weapons that seem to have been sorted into special boxes. This includes several halberd, katanas and quarterstaves. I'm guessing that most of them are vanquishing and power weapons. (My guess later turns out to be correct.) But what I am really am interested in are those reagents.

The whole time I had been desperately calling out over guild chat for assistance. A number of my associates gathered at my vendor house for when my gate goes up. I load all of the reagents into one bag and move them to a corner of the house no one is likely walk over. But just then, the owner comes upstairs. He is sorting magic weapons. He is bound to notice the missing ones.

That is what you'd think at least. But he casually wanders about, grabbing magic wands from the bag next to the now empty reagent box. Finally, after an agonizing ten minutes or so, it becomes clear that he knows that something is up. I'm guessing the noticed the missing reagents, now held in my hands, but too heavy to place in my backpack.

His friend GuardianKnight arrives, no doubt called in by his panicky friend who believes a looter has come and gone. By chance, they walk into the obscure corner of the house in which I am hiding. They go for the reveal. I drop the bag and begin to cast gate, only to be banned. The reagents are in the bag on the floor. I am banned. I unleash a torrent of cursing over the guild chat. Some times I just get that way.

But then I have a moment of genius. GuardianKnight rushes out to give me a dose of WTF OMG PVP ONE ON ONE. I finish casting the gate I began in the tower, which opens up at my vendor with all my eager associates--and my other stealther--patiently waiting. I go through, stealth right back into the house, right up the stairs and find the bag of reagents waiting just where I left them.

GuardianKnight and the owner are both standing there. GuardianKnight consoles him with these words, "Don't worry about. He does this kind of thing all the time." I pick up the reagent bag. This time I know what to do. They bump over me again and cast reveal. What could I do but say what had to be said: "I R NEW GLD PLS." Banned again, but this time with the reagents in my hand. The gate goes up directly to a bank, the reagents go in my bank.

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It was quite the feat. A DOUBLE LOOT! I am banned from the tower, the reagents slipping through my fingers, but a bit of quick thinking puts me right back in and the reagents in my bank.

Now that is impressive, if I do say so myself. Oh, but it doesn't end there. The associates went through the gate, and Miller manages his way into the tower, up the stairs, to the remaining loots. He helps himself to quite a few magic items, including a large collection of high quality magic jewelery.

TRIPLE LOOT!

We come back for the quad-loot. One of my associates, Tyrone Biggums, makes it in, but, alas, by now they have grown wise to our game. He is banned with nothing to show for it.

Now occasionally people do foolish things. My associate Downs decides, for whatever reason, that it would be a good idea to give away the password to #cA. A few people show up to see what all the fuss is about, including GuardianKnight. I leave you then with his own words to which I can add nothing.

03[21:04] * GuardianKnight (joined #cA
[21:04] <GuardianKnight> so i hear you like to pick on noobs.
[21:04] <GuardianKnight> and feel somewhat superior for doing it?

[21:06] <GuardianKnight> i'll tell you what guys....you hand all the crap i just donated back to them and i'll pretend this didn't happen.
01[21:06] <chumbucket> I tell you what.
01[21:06] <chumbucket> I'll cut and paste that and put it in the writeup.
[21:07] <GuardianKnight> Oh boy i get to be in the latest " i have nothing better to do in life" chumbucket picture thread?
[21:07] <GuardianKnight> goodie
01[21:07] <chumbucket> no no
01[21:07] <chumbucket> a proper thread
01[21:08] <chumbucket> cA Adventures I think

[21:08] <GuardianKnight> how bout you just stop being the bad guy every once in a while and do something nice?
01[21:08] <chumbucket> I volunteer at a soupkitchen!

(Not true.)

[21:14] <GuardianKnight> i feel sorry for you all.
03[21:14] * GuardianKnight (has left #cA

BUT THE FUN DOESN'T END THERE. NO SIRREE BOB! Let's not forget #secondage!

<GuardianKnight> Dude gets his dingy unlimp by stealing noobs weapons and regs. He needs to get a girlfriend.

<GuardianKnight> you are like weird porn. Your pictures keep the other weirdos from acting on their weird sex fetishes by looking at you do it.\

(I found that to be a particularly baffling comment.)

Epilogue: Some pictures that didn't quite fit elsewhere.

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We didn't.

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Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 11:11 pm
by Hicha
Epic.

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sat Sep 12, 2009 11:58 pm
by zzyzx
hiicha wrote:Epic.
Yeah, this was all in preparation for a UoH resist session to help the server. This wasn't a "pay 3k and we'll cast on you" event, it was free for everyone who wanted to come and gain some resist.

While I love the cA adventures, this one just didn't sit well with me. It'd be like looting one of the soup kitchens that chumbucket works at.

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 12:18 am
by son
my favorite part is when he threatens to use pvp force!

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 12:19 am
by chumbucket
In the future, I will ask all players whose towers I am about to loot (1) if they are new and (2) if they intend to use any of their lootable resources for resist sessions, dungeon romps, player events, tea times, bagball games, LEET PVP or roleplaying as an elvish princess . If it makes you feel better, I knowingly looted a resist session the day before, even got some death threats (in game death I mean) for that! (I'm still waiting for Bonghit to loot my house!)

If you are any of the following people, I will not loot you or steal from you: Blackfoot, Silverfoot, Coffee, MapOmatic. (Members of my guild might though.) Otherwise, you're on your own.

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 12:29 am
by Hemperor
Funny story. Would have gladly replaced the regs but pretty much everything I own (owned) has been raided, however I'll replace their value in gold if it means continuing your carebear inaccurate resist sessions, pm me.

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 12:32 am
by son
why the hell does mantle get a free pass? w/e

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 12:37 am
by GuardianKnight
pause

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 1:03 am
by zzyzx
chumbucket wrote: If you are any of the following people, I will not loot you or steal from you: Blackfoot[/b[, Silverfoot, Coffee, Wise, MapOmatic. (Members of my guild might though.) Otherwise, you're on your own.


Technically, you did steal from Blackfoot. He leads UoH, and this was a UoH sanctioned resist party that was even on the UoH calendar.

*shrug*

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 1:15 am
by GuardianKnight
zzyzx wrote:
chumbucket wrote: If you are any of the following people, I will not loot you or steal from you: Blackfoot[/b[, Silverfoot, Coffee, Wise, MapOmatic. (Members of my guild might though.) Otherwise, you're on your own.


Technically, you did steal from Blackfoot. He leads UoH, and this was a UoH sanctioned resist party that was even on the UoH calendar.

*shrug*



*chumbucket's head ESPLODES*

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 2:12 am
by JoshuaLee
Yet another story very well told, I enjoyed it thoroughly. I thank thee.

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 2:37 am
by GuardianKnight
<GuardianKnight> you are like weird porn. Your pictures keep the other weirdos from acting on their weird sex fetishes by looking at you do it.\


It was a reference to Law and order and about any other cop show where the criminal says he/she just looks at (insert weird fetish here) to keep his/her urges down. I explained this in that very same conversation but i guess it doesn't make a good attack on someone to tell a full story. Bill O'reilly is that you?

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 8:19 am
by chumbucket
Blackfoot is not UoH. One is a guild, another is a player.

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 9:07 am
by r0b
I like the stealing from the soup kitchen analogy. I think you're a clever and funny guy Chum, but stealin the regs from a open shard, player funded event was kind of not funny.

If I got it coming (ie. not doing detect hidden, leave half of a double door unlocked, gating from inside my house, etc...) I can live with that. I can even laugh at myself...and have. But this was pretty uncool.

Just sayin....


r0b

Re: cA Adventures: Triple Loot

Posted: Sun Sep 13, 2009 11:58 am
by Hemperor
No different than anything else cA does, but suddenly it isn't cool when it happens to you? All other times you are all laughing and crotch riding.