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My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 9:48 am
by Mens Rea
You other brothers can't UO
That when a girl walks in with an UO bitty waist
And a round UO in your face
You get UO
Wanna pull UO tough
Cuz you notice that tower was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's UO
I'm hooked and I can't ebolt staring
Oh, baby I wanna moongate ya
And take your UO
My guild UO to warn me
But that UO you got
Make Me UO horney
Ooh, rump of UO skin
You say you dragon tamer get in my benz
Well use dragon tamer me cuz you aint that average groupy

I've seen them UO
To hell with UO
programming or progaming I am Faust

I'm tired of mining
Saying flat ostard are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him UO
She gotta pack much UO

So Fellas (yeah) Felucca(UO)
Has your hired NPC female warrior got the butt (hell yeah)
Well shake it, shake UO, shake UOSA, shake UO, shake that healthy butt
Baby got an unmarked rune

(LA face with Oakland booty)

I like'em round and loot
And when I'm throwin a castle loot
I just can't help my guild
I'm actin like a tamed animal
Now here's my loot

I wanna get you UO
And UO, double up UO UO
I aint talkin bout guild
Cuz silicone parts were made for guilds
I wannem real thick and TG guild
So find that juicy Derrick
Mixalot's in Derrick
Beggin for a piece of that Derrick
So I'm lookin' at rock Derrick
Knockin these bimbos walkin like Faust
You can have them Blackfoot
I'll keep my women like UO
A word to the thick soul ian
I wanna get with ian
I won't cus or hit ian
But I gotta be straight when I say I have a kryss --
Til the break of third dawn
Baby Got it goin UO
Alot of pimps won't like this owned
Cuz them punks lie to hit it and quit UO
But I'd rather stay and play UO
Cuz I'm long and I'm 100 str
And I'm down to get the friction UO

So ladies (owned), Ladies (Faust)
Do you wanna roll in my ian (yeah)
Then turn recall
Stick it dragon
Even white wyrm got to shout
Baby got UO

(LA face with the Oakland UOoty)

Yeah UO
When it comes to females
UO ain't got nothin to do with my selection
36-24-36
Only if she's level 3

So your girlfriend throws a ostard
Playin workout tapes by lord british
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her bettle
My anaconda don't want none unless you've got buns UO
You can do side bends or sit-ups, but please don't lose that kryss
Some brothers wanna play that hard roleplayer
And tell you that the butt is gold
So they toss it and leave UO
And I pull up quick to "get" it
So cosmo says you're UO
Well I ain't down with UO
Cuz your waste is small and your curves are UO
And I'm thinkin bout Derrick
To the beanpole dames in the vendor
You aint it miss UO
Give me a sista I can't please take a look at my goods
Red beans and rice did miss UO
Some knucklehead ebolted to dis
Cuz his girls were on "my list"
He had game but he chose to FS 'em
And pulled up quick to get pvp with 'em
So ladies if the butt is PVP
And you wanna triple X throw PVP
Dial 1-900-MIXALOT and kick them UO thoughts
Baby got Faust
Baby got interior door key
Little in tha middle but she got much a large dragon ship deed x4

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 10:19 am
by Faust
Fellow Faustollowers unite and let's take a wide on the wagon.

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 11:04 am
by aXe
Can Mens Rea be banned from the forums yet? thanks.

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 11:11 am
by Karik Verlee
aXe wrote:Can Mens Rea be banned from the forums yet? thanks.
x2

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 11:58 am
by Pro
mens rea has quality posts.

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 12:27 pm
by Horsewang
Awful.

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 12:30 pm
by Domnu
Mens Rea wrote: Baby got Faust
Baby got interior door key
Little in tha middle but she got much a large dragon ship deed x4
Way to finish strong

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 12:48 pm
by Wise
Pro wrote:mens rea has quality posts.
x2

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 3:15 pm
by DrFaustus
Needs more hose beast...

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 4:53 pm
by ClowN
wow you are a nerd lol

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 11:02 pm
by nightshark
Entited "Shark"
Based on the song "Stan" by Eminem

Dear Faust

I posted to you, but you still ain't PMin'
I wrote my email, my msn and my ICQ at the beginnin'
I send two emails back in autumn,
You must not of got em
There probably was a problem with hotmail or something
Sometimes my typing's loose and fast when I'm havin fun
But anyway's, f**k it, what's been up man, how's your sons?
My pwnage is epic too, I'm a substitute father
If I start a new toon, guess what I'ma call him?
I'ma call him Faustie

I read about your uncle Sandro too, I'm sorry
I had a friend quit UO over a patch that was dauntin'
I know you probably hear this every day, but I'm your biggest admirer
I even used to read your posts on IPY forums about the hally timer
I got a room full of your posts and your screenshots man
I like the duel you had against [name] too, that shit was phat
(can't remember the name of the guy faust wasted in a duel after forum trash talk)
Anyways, I hope you get this man
Hit me back, just to chat,
Truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Shark

[chorus]

Dear Faust, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance
I ain't mad - I just think it's F**KED UP you don't answer fans
If you didn't wanna talk to me outside your castle
You didn't have to, but you coulda signed an autograph for Matron
(sorry matron, closest name to "matthew" i could think of)
That's my little sister man, she's only 12 years old
We waited amongst a bunch of orcs for 4 hours and you still said no
That's pretty shitty man, you're like her f**king idol,
She wants to be leet as you man, she practices more than I do
I ain't that mad though, I just dont like being lied to
Remember when we met in Vesper? You said if I write you
You would write back - see I'm just like you in a way
I never knew my son neither,
He ran away with his mother after I beat her
I can relate to what you're saying in your posts,
So when I have a shitty day I drift away and search your posts
Cause I don't really got shit else, so that shit helps when I'm depressed
I even got a torso with your name across the chest
Sometimes I even call people "son" while I'm online
It's like adrenaline, it gives me a superiority complex half the time
See everything you say is real, and I respect you cause you tell it
My girlfriend's jealous cause I talk about you 24/7
But she don't know you like I know you Faust, no one does
She don't know what it was like for people like us in '99
You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Shark -- P.S.
We should PK together too

[chorus]

Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-PM-Or-ICQ-My-Fans,
this'll be the last PM I ever send your ass
It's been six months and still no word - I don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two emails;
I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm on my horse right now, I'm gonna try and PK SPANKY
Hey Faust, I'm using a GM halberd, you dare me to try?
You know the song by Wise, "Second Age Boner"?
about that guy who constantly has a boner about UOSA
That's kinda how this is, your posts kinda turn me on
Now it's over, I'm on a stat PK about to 1v1 spanky
and all I wanted was a lousy email or an IM
I hope you know I ripped ALL of your posts off the wall
I love you Faust, we coulda been together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you SCREAM about it
I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you can't BREATHE without me
See Faust - Stop hitting me spanky! I'm trying to talk!
Hey Faust, that's SPANKY whacking me with a 25 vanq
but I didn't bring any pots, see I ain't like you
cause if he kills me all I lose is 20% of my attributes
Well, gotta go, I'm almost on 0% health now
Oh shit, I forgot, how am I supposed to send this shit out?


Critique all you want... extremely slow day at work :D

Re: My name is Faust and I can not lie [version 2]

Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 12:52 pm
by Mens Rea
I spent 4 minutes going through it and every time I didn't give a shit i pressed CTRL-V.

On my clipboard was the word UO.

If you look at the trash talk forum of version 1 of this song the main problem was that it did not include any mention of
UOSA.

I guess I over estimated the abilty of the shard to make their own metaphors using the lyrics.

I really like the Stan remake. I think it is clever and well done.