Last night at Lord British's time 0200 I was awoken by the call of my good friend Chubbs Peterson whom spoke of things of glory in small talk and then got right down to the point, as I showed a true sign of fatigue. He said unto me "Vega, for it is I, Chubbs Peterson who is first to inform you of great things to come! The treacherous villain War Problems has indeed come to his senses and wishes to speak with thee!" Elated, I went right to my "lulz FDA bluwz" runebook and recalled to their guild patio!
At their guild patio I saw a man cowering to his own actions on a fake noble name "Goofy", which was blue. Surely I thought this was because he had started to honor the 2nd agreement from the proposed truce. At this patio he said to me that he was kicked from the guild of murderers and thieves, and that he wishes revenge on them now. As it was blindingly obvious, I asked about his current name and if he agrees to the 2nd part of the truce as well. For in the clause, small print, you can't see it don't worry, it says that this is a truce for FDA and the members cited, so he would then only have to fulfill his obligation to Vega's Treaty of Gentleman. The treaty was set to be signed in Skara Brae, where it is legend that french fries and waffles originate.
However, it was a trap! Three murderers revealed themselves and asked for blood! Well, as a man of honor and courage I was not only surprised but jolted into action. Unfortunately, my Razor slave was sleeping during this battle, but I assure you it was glorious. I took a murderers head, one Donkey Aperture. The other two murderers while running used sorcery, strapped on wizard hats and the manliest of manly beards, then recalled away. For I being a man of the cloth brought my greatest knight, Bink. While sitting outside trying to reassure this unsuspecting Goofy character that I was not there to slay him a man appeared named Jumbi and as I chased him to say "Hail! How art thou? Well met!" he ran off towards Cove, only stopping in attempt to use his wizardry and toss my body head first into a mysterious blue bubble to an unheard of place called Vesper. Fear not fellow gentleman, I was suspicious of this poor soul the entire time. Just to think, Goofy was asking me prior "your not gunna kill me right?"
I drag you on through this tale not to leave out details, but with a purpose in mind. For it was Goofy who then recalled as I came back and before teleporting his body elsewhere said "fucks u faggot". I was bewildered! Dumbfounded! I could not believe my ears! All I could think was "How could he violate our treaty?!" I swore revenge on him once again. Worry not, I swore all apologies to Lord British prior to my following act.
![Image](http://i.imgur.com/MdhbQOk.png)
Seemingly disgruntled, I took extra care in walking my steps and playing hopscotch in Britain knowing that these scum would now be looking for me. I took no chances, and while going to see if anyone was home by knocking on their door late last evening, I by luck stumbled upon a crumbling house a short distance away from their own. I sat at this tower, doing what any fellow honorable gentleman would do and checking to see what were in his possessions so I could then later return them to him. My skilled hunter and tracker however picked up a disturbing presence. In my sights were Donkey Aperture, Detinher, and a seemingly fellow knight of glory named Jagged. Before I could act, the tower had fallen! In my generous curiosity and protection for an assumed fellow gentleman I had not met, I squandered through 50 empty chests to find 2 with items. This apparently was too daunting of a task or risk for a murderous fool. For these seemed to be his secured possessions hidden amongst his regular belongings, of which had clearly been thieved by another. Whilst contemplating where I should place a house for him to reclaim when he got back, the clearly disturbed Donkey Aperture (reference post #12 viewtopic.php?f=74&t=58325 ) showed his lack of appreciation for his new clothing hue. In his lack of success in stealing this gentle mans items, he then built domiciles in attempts to now steal his old home! One of the construction workers? Jagged! It seems I had been duped by this cowardice tyrant. However, I shall not make the same mistakes again.
![Image](http://i.imgur.com/oEUJLAn.png)
Unfortunately this coward had met his match. Now he can place nothing larger than his peasant homes, as I chopped the trees, molded the wood, and chiseled brick in a short enough time to put a home of my own behind his. My honor filled aptitude had brought me glory again and allowed me to slay this coward. After all, I do this for justice and the people.
![Image](http://i.imgur.com/TGyHdy6.png)
Readers, I jest not with you. For I do have a count of the loot, as this shall also make you fond of me and not this silly jester! Unfortunately, it was picked up by my poor, tired and old battle ridden hands because a malicious, evil boy by the name of Detinher had used his awful and intimidating axe to cut open the chests on the border of my home. Wishful thinking it seems, as the following was discovered:
One trophy honoring this clearly notorious and honorable man, two decorative bells of honorable and judicious men (appropriately Kaivan is pink), three finely crafted liberty and feathered hats, 5-7,000 of each reagent, two beard restyle creams, easter eggs and halloween candy (!!!!!!!), some bowls of delicious potatoes, and two (pirate?) treasure maps found in a bag with a book named "fives".
![Image](http://i.imgur.com/eyFuW70.png)
The truce offer still stands, as it has become quite a headache and responsibility to teach justice to fools. For teaching has never been a strong characteristic of mine, but the burden does seem to build... Who am I kidding? I am a man fighting the eternal battle for honor, justice, and glory of gentleman! However, one condition has been adjusted and will be discussed, if discussed, in the land of waffles and french fries.
1. War Problems changes his name to Vegas Slave
2. War Problems turns blue and never attempts to verbally impose his will on another individual.
3. Donkey Aperture leaves TWO formal apologies in this thread and the other, then offers a fair price of 60,000 gold pieces for his traumatic actions.
Until next time, stay safe Brittanians!